Why do people do it? Is it merely human nature? Having been a person who has gossiped and a victim of malicious gossip…I have set out to analyze and figure it out….

Basically I have come to the conclusion that there are 3 types of gossip. The first is a gossip that involves you directly, the second type does not involve you or anyone you know, and the third type does not involve you and is malicious.

Let's look at the first type of gossip. We will call it "venting" gossip. Venting gossip is when you have the urge to get advice from someone about a particular situation that you were in and you need advice. The gossip does not entail putting anyone down and/or getting the listening party to make judgments on other people. It is merely to get through an experience and or situation and to figure out how to deal with it. How do you deal with listening to such gossip? In my opinion, you need to tell that person to go and resolve it with the person that they are having a situation with.

Let's look at the second type of gossip. We will call it "celebrity" gossip. Celebrity gossip is harmless and involves "water-cooler" conversations. It does not directly affect you, but it does not directly hurt anyone either. Talking about the latest American Idol contestants or Brangelina's newly adopted baby will by no means affect anyone in your direct circle. Make conversation…be cordial…in this case…Gossip to your hearts content!

Let's look at the third type of gossip. We will call it "slander" NOT gossip. If person A tells you something about B without the explicit motive of resolving a situation with B, that's the first type of gossip. You need to tell A to go talk to B. If you do not, you are entertaining gossip. If you then go out and tell C, you are now spreading gossip—Not good. Even worse, When C tells you something designed to lower your opinion of B, that's slander (or malicious gossip, if you prefer). When this happens, it damages reputations, hurts a person's character and ultimately can destroy relationships.

Being the analytical person that I am…I had to do this…Being the victim of slander, I had to expose it. Watch what you say AND what you listen to…because even if you are the receiving end of gossip and don't say anything to stand up for the person being gossiped about…you are just as guilty. It will come back to you 3 fold…trust me!
 

have the courage to question & challenge the status quo... refuse to accept "traditional" thinking and answers as fact....
~Kimlee