I have talked to people and they have asked me advice on what to when they feel like they are so confused about life decisions in general.  Whether it be a just getting out of a long term relationship, being in the middle of a divorce, finding out you were cheated on, a decision about moving, taking on a new job, etc.  All of these life altering occasions and decisions can make someone very confused and almost feel like they have lost themselves in a way.

 

when you feel like you are so confused and don't know what to do, the first question I would like to ask you is "When was the last time you spent some time by yourself?...I mean REALLY by yourself!"  Most people cannot even think of the last time they scheduled some "ME" time alone with themselves by themselves. 

 

when feeling confused, asking other people for advice is a good thing, but at times we allow the opinion of others to alter our own judgement--whether good or bad.  Some people will effectively place doubt, fear and negativity in  your mind--without even realizing it.  It is important to schedule time alone and away from others in order to get honest with ourselves and really hear what is going on in our own minds and hearts.  with that said,  when feeling this way, take out your calendar, and schedule some time for yourself--NO distractions (ie: cell phones, TVs, ipods, other people, etc.) This is NOT a cliche--it really works. 

Bring only a pen/pencil and a journal/paper. 

Write down the following:

Writing is therapeutic, and when you see your thoughts in a written and organized fashion, your confusion will clear up. 

This may not happen immediately, but it is a necessary to follow up with this "ME" time as often as you need until the confusion clears and you regain your identity and clear minded status.